I’ve had the same best friend since we were 5 years old, but now we have very different ideas about what is fun. She always wants to go to parties, but I like to spend time doing new things with a smaller group of people.
People develop in different ways and at different rates. It can just be a difference of personality style. Some people are introverts and enjoy a few close friends and are energized by time alone. Others prefer large groups, lots of acquaintances, and are energized by being around people. Or, your interests are developing in a different direction than hers: you seem to be exploring new possibilities and focusing on relationships, while she seems to be caught up in the social party scene. You can maintain your friendship, even while you create your own identity. Find some common ground and activities you both enjoy. Adolescence is an important time in your life to find out more about yourself and the world.
When my brother was my age, he was allowed to stay out later than I’m allowed to stay out now. What gives?
There may be a few factors at work when one child in a family is granted privileges that another is not. Sometimes parents learn from past parenting mistakes, or simply learn new parenting techniques that they feel will help keep you safer and ultimately happier. Despite being raised in the same family, you are also a very different person from your older brother. Every person matures in different ways and at different rates. Your parents may be responding to the level of maturity and responsibility that you (and your friends) are showing.
What if I go to a party and it turns out differently than I expected?
Just give me a call and I’ll pick you up, no questions asked.
Why do you need to know my plans? Why do you have to meet my friends?
Because I care about you.
What do you do when someone you’ve been friends with since you were little is going in another direction?
Sometimes that happens. You are at a time in your life when there are lots of transitions and choices. If you no longer share common interests, it’s hard to maintain the friendship over time. If you both want to maintain the friendship, then you need to cultivate some common activities or interests.